Wednesday, July 04, 2007

"His Name is Death and Hell follows with him."

That title, a quote from Revelations, is on my writing board and meant to be for Dracula.
But really, it’s for me.
Writing is Hell! There are various circles. Second draft decision making. Editor’s notes to be implemented. Then there is the one I am stuck in now... First draft hell.
There’s one canto in Dante’s Inferno where the travellers walk across a frozen pond with heads poking up through the ice. Dante gives one a good kick.
I am the kicker and the kicked. Frozen and free, alternating.
I look back at journals and notice that I am often in pain. I tend to forget that in the joy of a finished draft, the further delight of an actual edition. But this of Dracula… a real pain in the neck! (You see! Even my jokes are poor!)
I am forging ahead, regardless. I am writing this first draft longhand to try to get the flow. But I am also letting a lot of stuff pass I would otherwise be tempted to fix and correct.
I have to trust the process, keep reminding myself that my only goal here is to find out what the story is. Writing is re-writing, I truly believe. But, eight novels under my belt or no, I still get the jitters, the critics’ carping voice sounds. “You’re writing rubbish!”
The subject is hard hard hard. I still haven’t quite worked out where Vlad Tepes falls in the scale of great slaughterers. I don’t believe he was a psychopath. But where does that leave him?
So sorry, all – and thanks Rachel for the prompt. Won’t promise to blog more but I will try. If that damn Impaler will let me!


Blogger roxi j said...

you can't believe that you are getting paid to do the thing you love? i can't believe that i'm not. so, you will help me won't you. i've tried to very hard, obviously not hard enough. but try as i may still i don't get paid. check out a couple of my blogs, give me some advise and some referrals....thanks

1:22 PM  

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